Sorrow and Anger

you make me so angry
yet I know somehow I can still love you
And I hate myself for
Letting this happen
My love's deep
It seeps through my skin
your kiss was razorblade
and it made me cry everytime
I felt dirty after you left me
I have this blade to my throat,
Somehow wishing it was your neck
I had it to
I want to kill you
Yet I love you
How can I love
and hate you
When you've broken my heart so?
Why does my heart still
Cry out your name
after you' crushed it
after you shattered it against the wall?
why do I want to die
when I feel like I should
kill you?
why do I feel like
Running into your arms
When I want to run
this blade through your chest
Watching the blood fall to the floor
but I'd do it to myself before you
because I'm a slave to love
you hit me deeply
so I hit you back
the only way possible
I HOPE IT F*CKING HURT!
I wish I couldn't hate you
I wish I didn't still love you
You've burrowed your way
so deeply into me
into my heart
that I can't shatter it to kick you out
You're still here
Whispering lies in my ear
telling me I'm pretty
telling me you love me
telling me about forever
telling me I have your heart
when you admitted
you just gave it to someone else
why do I hate you
why can't I hate you?
why do I love you?
Why do I still trust you?
I want to spill your blood
to make you share my pain
but I couldn't hurt you...
could I?